Avoid Custody Issues on Halloween by Talking to Your Custody Lawyer

Posted on by Kristen Anders Bojarski

Sharing custody at Halloween doesn’t have to be all “Double, Double, Toil and Trouble!”

The entire month of October is such a fun time of year for children.  It is a month full of fall festivals, pumpkin-picking and hayrides, topped off with dressing up in a costume and trick-or treating in the neighborhood on Halloween.  It seems that every year, however, some children’s Halloween fun gets spoiled because their parents have a disagreement over some Halloween-related matter.  If you think you are going to experience some problems this Halloween, do yourself (and your kids) a favor and talk to your custody lawyer about them ahead of time.  In the meantime, here are some tips:

Be Specific in Your Custody Agreement to Avoid a “Ghoulish” Argument

Make sure that your custody agreement regarding Halloween (and all other  holidays) clearly states which parent is to have the children on Halloween, and at what times.  Depending on where you reside, your agreement might need to specify whether “Halloween” means October 31, or whether it means the date your neighborhood has trick-or-treating.  If the agreement is not clear, talk to your child custody lawyer about this.

Lack of Communication is a Nightmare

If you and the other parent are going to take the children trick-or treating together, make sure to communicate about the details in advance.  Know which neighborhood you are going to take the children trick-or-treating, where you are going to meet, which one of you is going to get the kids ready, etc.  Avoid a potential situation where you and your ex are left arguing in front of the kids because you weren’t able to communicate effectively.

Don’t be a Petty Pumpkin!

Try not to argue about things like Halloween costumes.  If your ex chooses a costume for your child that you absolutely hate, then pick your own costume and go trick-or-treating on a different day in a different neighborhood if it is that important to you. What good would come out confronting your ex about their terrible (to you) choice of costume?  Nothing, except hard feelings.  When co-parenting, you must pick your battles.  This is true for separated and intact families alike.

Avoid Howling at the Other Parent

If it is your ex’s turn to have the children for Halloween this year, and you just know that he or she will allow the kids to stay up too late, eat way too much Halloween candy, watch scary movies that you don’t approve of, etc., it’s time to get over it.  Unless there is a real safety concern, you can’t control what happens during your ex’s custody time.  Every parent has their own parenting style.  Different doesn’t always mean wrong.

Don’t be Afraid to Take the Big Issues to Court Ahead of Time

If there is a bigger issue, such as one parent doesn’t believe in celebrating Halloween for religious reasons, then you must speak with a child custody lawyer.  The custody lawyer would probably tell you that in most cases, parents share legal custody, meaning that they both have to agree on legal custody matters.   While a judge may grant one parent legal custody to make decisions on behalf of the children in very specific situations, it is unlikely a judge will do so when there is a dispute about religion. Lots of parents have different religious views.  In those families, it is actually a benefit for the children to learn different views, and even more of a benefit when they observe their parents tolerating and even respecting each other’s views.

So this Halloween, don’t be haunted by conflict.  Communicate with the other parent in advance to make sure you are both on the same page.  If you expect that there will be issues, talk to your custody lawyer.

 

 

 

How to be an Executor of an Estate

Posted on by Barbara J. Shah

Benjamin Franklin said that two things are certain:  Death and Taxes.

Most of us accept the fact that we will die sooner or later, hopefully later.  However, how many of us are prepared for our death, or the deaths of our parents and loved ones, in the matter of disposing of our (or their) earthly possessions?  Many TV lawyers frighten particularly older adults, suggesting that unless they take certain steps (like sign up for a living trust which they will happily sell you for a couple thousand dollars or so), the state or the government will “dispose of their assets for them” or even take them. This is TOTAL BALONEY.

What happens when you don’t have a will?

In Pennsylvania, the assets of every person who dies without having a will and owning assets at the time of their death are distributed to their heirs under an orderly system set forth in PA law, which determines who are the natural heirs of the deceased and how the estate is to be divided between them. To do this, a relative (or family friend who is willing to do the job if family members do not want it) is appointed the “administrator” of an estate by the Register of Wills of the County the decedent (legal term for the person who died) lived in, and the law provides the steps the administrator must take to properly administer the estate and distribute the remaining assets to the heirs.  This is not to say that the process always runs smoothly; often there are disputes between the heirs, sometimes even over who is to be administrator, as well as over the appropriate distribution of the assets.  Writing a will while still alive and having the ability to do so, naming an executor, naming the heirs, and listing how the assets of the “testator” (This is the legal term for the person who wrote the will. The female version is “testatrix”) are to be divided saves time, attorney fees and expenses, and hard feelings between heirs.

It’s All in a Name

What is the difference between an “executor” and an “administrator?” An “Executor” (the term for a female executor is “Executrix”) is the person listed by the deceased person in their will to carry out the estate administration.  Quite often a secondary or successor executor will be named, in case the first named executor is unwilling or unable to carry out the duties of administering the estate.

 Executors have a Fiduciary Duty

The executor is called in legal terms a “fiduciary.”  That means that the executor is bound by law to faithfully carry out the instructions of the testator in administering the estate, as well as by the law of Pennsylvania, and when they are sworn in at the Register of Wills, they take an oath to do so.  This means that they should act promptly to collect and safeguard the assets of the estate, without playing favorites among the heirs. If there are cash assets or other accounts of the decedent, bank or investment accounts, they need to be converted into estate accounts, which means that a social security (estate identification) number must be obtained for the estate. The executor must make sure that all assets of the testator are located, insured and kept safely from theft. The executor must prepare and file and estate inventory listing the assets of the estate and their values.  Then they must prepare and file a PA inheritance tax form and pay any inheritance taxes due on estate assets from the assets of the estate. They must also make sure that all legitimate debts of the decedent are paid from the estate assets and reimburse those who paid funeral or other death-related expenses for the decedent.  They may need to sell some of the assets of the estate to accomplish this, and they must attempt to get the best price possible (the “fair market value”) for these sales.  Any proceeds from these sales must go into the estate account. In certain cases, the judge of the county Orphans Court must specifically approve of the sale of real estate. If some of the heirs are minors, a trust may be needed to be set up for them, if not specifically set forth in the will. PA law provides that the executor, as well as the attorney for the estate, who usually prepares the paperwork and guides the executor in administering the estate, are entitled to be compensated for their work, but these fees may not be “excessive,” considering the amount of work done, and they are always subject to review by the court which must approve the final accounting necessary to close the estate.

Closing the Estate

If all the debts of the deceased have been paid, and all the heirs are adults and agree as to the values of the assets, the expenses of the estate, and the distribution of the remaining assets of the estate, a Family Settlement Agreement may be prepared by the lawyer and signed by all the heirs.  Then and only then can the estate be closed and all of the remaining assets distributed. If the heirs are not in agreement or some of the debts of the deceased have not been paid, the lawyer must prepare an accounting and take the case to audit in front of the Orphans Court judge, where those who disagree, including creditors of the estate, may raise objections to the actions of the executor, the values of the assets, the attorney fees and costs and executor fees, and such during the audit proceeding.  If an executor is found to have wasted assets of an estate or converted them to his or her own use, they may be fined, and in severe cases, prosecuted and jailed.

Choose your Executor Wisely

In sum, the executor of the estate is responsible for acting promptly, fairly and following the instructions of the testator and the law.  He or she can be removed as executor by the judge upon petition by heirs or creditors if he or she does not carry out their fiduciary duties responsibly.  When clients come to me to write a will for them, and we come to the part where they name an executor to administer their estate, I instruct them firmly:  This is not an honorary position.  It is work, and it requires patience and duty and fairness.  Do not pick your oldest, or your son, or some other family member just because you are concerned that they might feel left out or slighted.  Pick the person (maybe not even a relative) best suited to be the business manager of your estate.  If you have been chosen as executor of an estate, be sure to execute your duties faithfully and fairly.

 

 

 

Practical Advice in Choosing the Right PA Divorce Lawyer

Posted on by Barbara J. Shah

Choosing the right lawyer to handle your divorce is not an easy one, and it certainly isn’t a decision one should make lightly.  But with the thousands of lawyers that are currently practicing law in Pennsylvania, how do you make the right choice?  Read on for some practical advice in choosing the right PA divorce lawyer for you:

Beware of Lawyer Rating Services

Many younger PA divorce-seekers do a lot of divorce research on-line, or they assist older divorce-seekers in finding information online.

Most of the online lawyer rating services are unreliable, IMHO. We don’t know all of the lawyers in our area of Southwestern, PA who do divorces, but we pretty much know who the good ones are.  We see that some lawyers have high ratings that we believe are totally unjustified in terms of our knowledge of their expertise in handling divorce matters.  It seems old fashioned, but word-of mouth referrals are usually your best bet.  Ask people you know who’ve been through a divorce for a referral!

Insist on Meeting your PA Divorce Lawyer in person

Many divorce seekers (or seekers of divorce information) don’t know what to expect from lawyers during their consultation appointment, or thereafter.

It is virtually impossible to conduct an effective consultation appointment over the telephone, or in an internet chat; we need to look each other in the eye and gauge whether we are getting accurate information or whether the information we are giving the potential client is getting through. Some clients lie…

You Get What You Pay For

If a divorce lawyer is offering you a “free consultation,” they must not be busy enough; there may be a reason for this…

If the divorce lawyer has no support staff, or works out of his or her basement, maybe they are building up a practice (hey, I started by sharing law office space with an established lawyer), but bear in mind that it is likely they may not be available to you when needed, as they have to go to court, write pleadings, answer telephone messages, etc. all by themselves. Yes, voice mail and text messaging is handy, but if you have a burning question, it may be cold comfort to you.

As a corollary to the above, then, bear in mind that a lawyer whose fees appear to be “cheap” or much less expensive than others, may have insufficient support staff. Personnel and offices and computer systems cost money, but they make the lawyer much more available to answer important client questions and take action in emergencies.  If you don’t get a response within 24 hours to an urgent question, (it should be the same day), it brings a level of anxiety into the process which experienced lawyers want to avoid.

Just because a lawyer is expensive, however, it doesn’t mean that they are the lawyer for you. Ask around, find out how satisfied friends or relatives or co-workers have been with their divorce attorneys (or how impressed they were with the skill level of their spouse’s attorney).

Real, practical advice = Good Advice

The right lawyer for you will take in a great deal of information about you and your marriage, your children, and your spouse, and they will educate you on the divorce, support, and custody laws of Pennsylvania. They will tell you hard truths, truths you may not want to hear but need to know.

The right lawyer will have a sense of humor, be able to relate, but will not feel sorry for you. We must analyze the situation as the court would and work to develop a strategy to reach an outcome that is acceptable, in the long run. As changes occur, they will keep you informed and will modify the strategy, with your approval.

Communication is Key

The right lawyer will keep you informed and will communicate with you regularly, usually by email, and will want your input and response to actions and communications in your case.

Your lawyer will charge you for all communications, telephone, email, written, etc., because he or she has nothing to “sell” but his or her time. Don’t expect them to work for free, particularly when they have an office, staff, and other overhead expenses.

Divorce Lawyers should be Tough, but Professional (even if you secretly hope they beat your ex into a pulp on the courtroom floor)

Your lawyer will very likely know and hopefully have a cordial relationship with your spouse’s lawyer. Our job is not to hate or scorn the other side; our job is to get the best result for our client, and we have learned that cooperation, not flame-throwing, is the best way to achieve this with a minimum of expense.

Few Surprises

It is possible but unlikely that you will be unhappily surprised by developments in your case, if you have been listening to your lawyer and following their instructions. Most experienced divorce lawyers are fairly good predictors of outcomes and are trying to save you attorney fees and anxiety by attempting to settle your case, along lines you have already discussed and are prepared for.

Choose Wisely

 

If you hear someone complaining that divorce lawyers are money-grubbing thieves, it is possible that they have had a bad experience with their lawyer.  We have met many of those people, and we have performed case “rescue missions” more times that we can count.  Or it is possible that they had unreasonable expectations or are trying to get something for nothing.  Choose wisely.  Your future may depend on it.

 

 

Rethinking Equally Shared Custody Arrangements

Posted on by Barbara J. Shah

In Pennsylvania, until the 1970’s, when parents of children under the age of 18 separated, the “tender years doctrine” applied.  That meant that there was a presumption in the law that children “of tender years” were better off with their mothers as their primary custodians.  It also meant father were relegated to the role of “visitors,” and that the custody arrangements for fathers were known as “visitation,” generally something like every other weekend and a dinner visit or two during the week, and some sharing of holiday custody.   In order to obtain  “primary custody” of his children, a father had to prove that the children’s mother was “an unfit mother.”  Do these phrases sound familiar?  Well, they shouldn’t, because for the last 40 years or so, the “tender years doctrine” has been outlawed in Pennsylvania, since PA adopted an equal rights amendment to its constitution.

That is not to say that PA courts enthusiastically accepted the demise of the “tender years” doctrine automatically.  The same judges who had been automatically awarding custody of children to mothers were still on the bench, some of them for many years thereafter.  It was as if even though a new custody law was adopted which required that “the best interests of the child” be considered by the courts in awarding custody, the scales seemed to tip in favor of mothers for quite a while.   After all, mothers could proudly claim, they had been the stay-at-home parent for the children for their whole lives, and the fathers didn’t know the first thing about parenting.  Well, that was then and this is now.

As we know, married women with children have been entering the workforce in great numbers during the last 40 years.  More good-paying jobs have opened for women, and women have for some time been a growing part of college and professional education students.  When I began my college education many years ago, the ratio of “boys” to “girls” on campus was something like 4 to 1.  Now is it often 50-50, and in some areas of higher education women outnumber men.  Men have in many cases stepped up to the task of co-parenting children with their wives.   However, another trend that has affected families is the sheer number of divorces and out-of-wedlock births which have made the old profile of mother-father relationships nearly obsolete.

Judges have changed too.  The old judges have died or retired, and the new breed of judges, raised in the latter part of the 20th century or the first part of the 20th century, don’t usually tip the scales in favor of mothers any more.  Despite the shrill claims of “Fathers’ Rights” groups, there is no presumption based on gender.  Ask any lawyer who practices family law primarily (or solely); they will tell you that when they first meet a judge or other court officer in a custody situation, the judges expect them to offer some kind of equally shared custody arrangement between mother and father, or be prepared to explain/fight for some other arrangement.   The “Ackerman plan,” or 5-5-2-2- custody arrangements, came into vogue around the turn of the century, and these have been enshrined as ideal custody arrangements for all children, along with shared legal custody (shared decision-making) of the children.

.  Another development which pushed this movement along was the adoption in PA of modified child support guidelines that gave a break in child support payments to support obligors with 40% or more overnights with the children.

So this social experiment has been happening for some time, and how it is working?  As lawyers concerned for the welfare of children involved in custody disputes, our observation is that the results are mixed at best.  We are delighted when we are able to assist an involved and caring parent in obtaining substantial custody time with the children, be it the mother or the father. What we are less delighted with is that the less experienced judges whom we appear in front of in child custody cases seem to have adopted a general presumption that equally shared custody is best for everyone. What that means is that when equally shared custody does not appear to fit this family well, we have to work (and spend large quantities of clients’ money) to overcome this unspoken “presumption.”  It was not contained in the recently-modified PA custody law. One size fits all is not for every family.  What the 5-5-2-2 schedule means for children is that they have a lot of adjustments to make, and they bear the brunt of the going back and forth between households several times a week.  In a recent article in the local legal journal, a Pittsburgh area family lawyer recounts the experience of being one of those children in a situation where the parents or the court adopted a 5-5-2-2 custody schedule for her and her younger siblings.  In her case, her parents refused to communicate directly, and it put the crushing burden on her, a young teenager, trying to find her place in the world, to make any schedule changes or accommodations between the parents, to make this schedule “work.”  In her mind, because of non-cooperation and non-communication between her parents, this schedule was unfair to the children.  Don’t get me wrong, there are lots of advantages to children of a custody schedule which permits them substantial contact with both caring and loving parents, when they are able to cooperate.  Children’s mental health is more stable when both parents are actively involved in their lives. It’s when one parent is so angry or bitter at the other parent and insists on sharing “his” or “her” side of the marital dispute with the children in an attempt to turn them against the other parent, that this kind of arrangement breaks down.  Cooperation and co-parenting is a must for shared custody arrangements to work well for the children.

It would be good if judges, rather than reflexively suggesting an equal overnight custody schedule for every family, took the parents’ ability and/or willingness to cooperate and communicate into account more often, in thinking about custody arrangements.   That would be in the children’s’ best interests.

How is PA Child Support Collected and Enforced?

Posted on by Barbara J. Shah

PA child support is collected by the state, once an order for support is          entered.  The process of filing for support and establishing a support order  are subjects of other posts.   This post assumes that you are the payor/obligor of a PA child support order which has been entered and is being enforces by PACSES, the PA State Child Enforcement System.  The arm of this system which collects and disburses support payments is called PASCDU, the PA Support Collection and Disbursement Unit.  Once a child support order has been entered, a case number is assigned to the case (and separate identification numbers are assigned to each party and child involved in the order.)  A wage attachment goes out to the payor’s employers from PASCDU, to enforce the order.  If there are arrearages, the wage attachment is generally increased to collect any arrearages.

PASCDU keeps a close watch on support orders and payments – they are required to by the Federal Government, which funds most state child support collection efforts.  Once an obligor falls 30 days in arrears on the amount of the order, collection efforts begin, which can include scheduling a contempt hearing, notifications to credit rating agencies, seizing bank accounts, and even suspending driver’s licenses and professional licenses.  If an obligor files a tax return and expects a refund, but owes arrears on child support, the refund will be used to pay any outstanding arrears.  It hasn’t always been this efficient; years ago, arrears were often accumulated in large amounts for various reasons.  Nowadays, because of penalties imposed by the Federal government and massive computer databases, those cases are much more rare.

In cases where the obligor is self-employed, wage attachments may not be effective in collecting the full amount of support, but the PASCDU computers and collection system are on the case 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.  A contempt hearing is likely to be scheduled, and at that hearing, the obligor is given an opportunity to make arrangements to pay the arrearages, and make on-time payments thereafter, but it is not uncommon for the court to order the obligor to jail if the obligor does not comply with the payment arrangements set by the court. PASCDU does not care if the obligor is able to pay rent or car payments; its first goal is to collect support ordered by the PACSES system.

There is no statute of limitations on court-ordered child support payments, nor can they be avoided by moving to another state or by taking another job.  PASCDU will track the obligor through their social security number and will obtain assistance from the state the obligor has moved to, to collect the order.  States are required by the Federal government to cooperate and assist other states in collecting support payments from persons who reside within their borders.

The moral of this story is:  if you owe a Pennsylvania child support order, you must pay it as ordered.  If for some reason the amount of the order is not correct, or circumstances have changed which make the existing order no longer appropriate, you must file a petition for modification in the state which entered the order, to change the amount.  Shah Law Group is experienced in working with Pennsylvania child support cases and can assist in this process.  Give us a call!

Bifurcation is Still Alive and Kicking in PA

Posted on by Barbara J. Shah

Last month we posted a blog article on bifurcation of divorces in PA.  As we explained, the term “bifurcate” means to divide something into two parts.  When applied to a divorce, to “bifurcate” means to grant a divorce, giving a person the right to legally remarry, while other issues, such as property division and alimony, remain pending.  While bifurcation can happen in PA, for divorces granted after 1980, it has become relatively rare since the divorce law was amended in 2004 to require that all claims related to a divorce be resolved before a divorce is granted, except in rare and unusual circumstances.

Last week, the PA Superior Court, the appeals court which decides on appeals from PA trial courts (called Common Pleas Courts) posted a decision that reminds Pennsylvanians that bifurcation is alive and well for divorces granted between 1980 and 2004. The divorces to which this concept applies is the “3301(d)” divorce, the divorce in which one spouse files for divorce (the “plaintiff”)  and then files and serves a notice on the other spouse (the “defendant”) that the parties have lived separate and apart for two years (or 3 years prior to 1987 divorce law amendments), and the other spouse takes no action other than to file a response (called a “counter-affidavit”) saying they agree on the period of separation, but they want to raise claims (such as for property division, alimony, etc.).   In this recently-decided case, the plaintiff  (husband) served the divorce complaint and the 3301(d) affidavit on the defendant (wife) in 1998, and the wife, apparently unrepresented, filed a counter-affidavit stating that she wanted to raise a claims for property distribution.  She didn’t file any claims, however.  The husband’s attorney filed the paperwork to make the divorce final, indicating that “property distribution” was still pending.   The divorce was granted by the court, noting in the decree that the court retained jurisdiction to resolve any issues raised but not settled before the divorce.

Fourteen years later, the ex-wife apparently saw an attorney who reviewed the court records and decided that ex-wife might still have a valid claim to ex-husband’s pension.  The attorney filed the paperwork to raise a claim on ex-wife’s behalf for property distribution.  Ex-husband’s attorney filed a motion to dismiss ex-wife’s claim on the grounds that she had never actually raised the claim before the divorce was granted, and that it had been too long since the divorce to raise any claims.  The trial court judge agreed with ex-husband and dismissed ex-wife’s claim. Last week, the Superior Court reversed the trial judge and reinstated ex-wife’s claim for property distribution.

Creative lawyering strikes again!

Bifurcation in a Pennsylvania Divorce Proceeding

Posted on by Barbara J. Shah

The term “bifurcation” means to divide something into two parts.  When this term is applied to a divorce, it generally means, “Can I get divorced – legally free to remarry and file my taxes as single – while other issues such as property division are still pending?”  Before 1980, the term did not apply to PA divorces.  The only kind of divorce allowed before that was a “fault” divorce (where the spouse who wanted a divorce had to allege “grounds” for divorce – that they were entirely innocent and the other spouse had committed such bad acts as to cause the marriage to fail – and then prove those grounds in a trial). If they were successful, or if the other spouse simply didn’t put up a defense, the divorce was granted. Property division was easy, as it followed “title.” that is, if a bank account or a pension or a piece of real estate was in your name, you owned it after the divorce, free and clear of any claims by the other spouse.  If an asset was owned jointly, it was to be split between the parties 50-50.  There was no post-divorce alimony.

If you thought that was still the law in PA, you are more than 35 years behind the times!  The Divorce Code of 1980, which became effective that year, revolutionized divorce law in PA. Many Pennsylvanians had been living separate and apart for many years, resigned to fact that that if they were not the “innocent and injured spouse,” they could not get a divorce from their former loved one.   Suddenly in 1980, the floodgates opened. “No-fault” divorce became legal in PA.  As originally written, the law granted the right for a “guilty” spouse who had been living separate and apart for 3 years or more to request a divorce from the “innocent” spouse by filing an affidavit alleging a 3 year or more separation, and serving it on the other spouse.  Suddenly there was no defense to the divorce, and the best thing the defendant/spouse could do was to request from the court a fair property distribution and some alimony.  For other just then separating couples, it gave the left-behind spouse a 3-year window to get ready for the divorce.   In 1987, the law was changed to turn the 3-year separation requirement into a 2-year separation.  By 2016 it left PA one of the few states in the US with a long separation requirement, possibly the longest one.  However, in 2016, the PA legislature again changed the law to allow a party to request a divorce from the other spouse after only a 1-year separation (so long as that separation began after December 3, 2016).   Of course, if both spouses agreed to a divorce under the 1980 Divorce Code, they could file their consents to the divorce at any time after 90 days from the date the divorce was served on the other party.  That portion of the law has never changed.

However, this entire discussion about “no-fault” divorce involves the divorce only; property division, (called “equitable distribution” by the new divorce code”), alimony, and requests for attorney fees could not be addressed until grounds for a divorce had been established.   Unlike the previous “title” approach to property division, equitable distribution assumes that everything acquired during a marriage by either party, regardless of title, is “marital property” and will be divided between the parties according to what is “fair,” by the courts, if the parties are unable to agree.

During the period when a “no-fault” divorce could only be requested after a 3-year separation (or even a 2-year separation) in PA, bifurcation was a hot topic. In addition, those couples who had been separated for (sometimes many more than) 3 years at the time the new Divorce Code became effective, were anxious to move on with their lives.  They wanted a mechanism whereby the divorce itself could be granted while property division was pending.   Initially, the courts often “bifurcated” divorces as a matter of course.  However, because of the problems of dividing pensions, pensions beneficiary designations, the loss of health insurance, and a host of other issues, the courts began to deny bifurcation if one spouse said no.  In 2004, an amendment to the Divorce Code put an end to bifurcation of divorces.  Although under certain extreme circumstances divorces can still be bifurcated, especially now that the one-year separation rule has gone into effect, requests for bifurcation are less and less likely to be made, and less likely to be granted by the courts.

3 Mistakes to Avoid When Hiring a Family Law Attorney

Posted on by Barbara J. Shah

Family law attorneys are experts in many different issues. They’ve dedicated their practice to helping families solve problems and create solutions. Whether you’re facing divorce or are in the process of adopting, an attorney can assist you. When seeking the help of an attorney, there are a few common mistakes that people make. Avoiding these mistakes ensures that you retain proper representation and that your legal troubles are handled correctly.

Waiting too long to hire an attorney

Many people wait too long to hire an attorney. Instead of searching out the right representation as soon as the situation calls for it, they wait to see how things play out. Maybe they think that they can work things out without an attorney or maybe they spend too much time researching which attorney to hire. Either way, it’s important to hire an attorney quickly to ensure that you’re treated fairly throughout the process.

Hiring an attorney that doesn’t specialize in Family Law

While it’s important to hire someone quickly, it’s more important to hire the right person. There are dozens of attorneys out there. Chances are you probably know an attorney. Not every lawyer should be trusted with your case. It’s important that you find an attorney that specializes in family law, has passed the bar, and has experience in dealing with cases like yours.

The attorney that you do hire should be able to give you some basic answers up front. Many people make the mistake of hiring an attorney that looks good on paper, but doesn’t give them the right information from the beginning. Whether it’s their financial policy or their strategy, a good attorney will always be transparent.

Hiring an attorney that you don’t trust

Finally, don’t make the mistake of hiring an attorney that you don’t feel comfortable with. You’re trusting your finances and the future of your family to your chosen lawyer. It’s important that you trust them and feel confident in their ability to represent you.

The Shah Law Group, located in Bethel Park, is your source for legal representation. Our practice was built on the philosophy that each client interaction should be handled carefully and efficiently. We continually strive for exceptional communication and compassion. No matter what your legal issues may be, trust the Shah Law Group to handle them.

Explore your legal options by visiting www.shahlawgroup.com.

Child Support Conferences and Hearings – No Place for Amateurs!

Posted on by Kristen Anders Bojarski

You have just received a notice and order that your spouse, former spouse, or other parent has filed a complaint for child or spousal support or Alimony Pendente Lite (APL – spousal support pending a divorce), and that you must appear in court for a conference/hearing. This notice gives you a date, time, and place to appear, and a list of documents you must bring to the conference/hearing.

In Allegheny County, both parties first attend a conference before a Domestic Relations Officer (DRO), who uses a computer program to generate a guideline monthly support number based on incomes and other information provided by the parties.   The parties are encouraged to reach an agreement, which will then be typed up into a consent order for support and signed by the parties.  If the parties don’t reach an agreement, they proceed straight to a hearing that day.

In other counties, like Washington and Westmoreland, if you don’t reach an agreement at the conference, you go home.  The DRO issues a recommendation for an order (which goes into effect immediately), and if either party is dissatisfied, they can request a “de novo” hearing (an evidentiary hearing before the hearing officer) which is scheduled at a later date.  Sounds like cake, right?  You can do this yourself without having to pay a lawyer, right?

Not so fast.  The majority of support cases in PA are resolved at the DRO level. Although not all parties consent to the guideline amount of support that the DRO comes up with, many do or at least use the guideline number as a starting point to negotiate. For this reason, it is very important to have a good idea of what the guideline “number” is before the conference.

To prepare for a DRO conference, I always meet with my client ahead of time, have them bring with them all of the documents required by the order, and analyze the facts of the case, my client’s income and the other party’s income if it is available to me, and then run various guideline scenarios on a special computer program designed for that purpose, depending on the facts of that particular case. Although what you can “afford” is not relevant to the amount of the order (many support payers are surprised by this), there are special facts and “deviations” which could affect the amount of the final order.

It is always surprising to me to see how many attorneys show up at a DRO conference without having prepared their own guideline calculations ahead of time.  This lack of preparation is a real disservice to the client, and was described at a CLE (continuing legal education) course I recently attended as “malpractice.”

DRO’s are generally very good at what they do, but they are not attorneys.  In counties like Allegheny, it is not for a DRO to know or tell the parties when a deviation is appropriate.  Plus, DRO’s are human; they sometimes make mistakes.  It is very easy for a DRO to mistakenly calculate the guideline monthly support amount as though one party has primary custody of the children, when the parties really have some sort of shared custody arrangement.  I’ve also had DRO’s mistakenly input a party’s weekly income as monthly income.  It’s easy to imagine how a mistake like this could greatly impact the guideline number that is generated.  If you are prepared and have an idea of what the guideline number should be, it is easy to catch a mistake by comparing numbers with the DRO’s.

If the attorney has not prepared their own calculations ahead of time, how can they possibly know if the DRO made a mistake?  They don’t know, and as a result, they allow their clients to agree to support orders that can be terribly unfair.  Some errors go unnoticed for years, if they are ever caught at all.  Everyone knows someone who complains they are paying too much or receiving too little in child support.  If they didn’t use an attorney experienced in support issues, maybe their order is incorrect.

If you have a support proceeding coming up, insist that you meet with your attorney ahead of time, so that they can go over the documents with you, prepare a guideline calculation, and then determine if some deviation or special circumstance may apply in your case.   If your attorney doesn’t do this, find another attorney.

On the other hand, if you already have a support order established, and it was entered at the DRO level without any preparation beforehand, I strongly encourage you to meet with an attorney to determine if the amount was appropriate considering your circumstances.

Sure, you are entitled to represent yourself, or get your neighbor’s friend who is a real estate attorney to represent you at a support conference/hearing.  I wouldn’t fix a broken leg by myself or go to an eye doctor for it.  Better to prepare properly rather than trying to fix something wrong later.  Sometimes we are unable to fix your mistakes, and you may end up paying a steep price for a bad decision.

An Open Letter to Adult Children of Divorcing Parents

Posted on by Kristen Anders Bojarski

Dear Adult Children of Divorcing Parents:

So your parents are going through a divorce.  Seems odd, right?  We tend to think of divorce like a sickness we acquaint with childhood, such as chickenpox.  If this was destined to happen, your parents should have gotten it over with in your early childhood years, right?  Actually, it is not uncommon for people who are in their later years of life with adult children to decide to get divorced.  There are a lot of reasons for this phenomenon.  Some people choose to wait until their children are grown, some grow apart over the years, some “cheat” on the other, or maybe they just fall out of love and are tired of going through the motions.  Sometimes one parent who has been bullied and belittled (and sometimes abused) by the other during the marriage gets counseling and gets up the nerve to go.

No matter what the reason your parents are splitting up, we have two words for you:  Butt out!

However, once you establish an adult relationship with your parents, you will find that adult relationships are not that simple.   Some things which appear to be entirely the fault of one parent come into focus as more of a shared issue.  You may come to realize that you are identifying with the bullying parent and have disdain for the bullied parent, which you have been experiencing all of your life. Let me give you a clue:  if one parent comes crying to you for support and to get yet on “their side” in the divorce litigation – Run!  You are a child of both parents; if that parent needs someone to talk to, they should get professional help.  Unloading their anxieties and frustrations of the marriage or the divorce litigation on their children is very unhealthy, both for the parent and the child.

We are always concerned when adult children get involved in the divorce litigation to support one parent or punish the other.  (In fact, this unfortunately happens with non-adult children.  If you see a parent unloading on an at-home, minor sibling, step in and tell the parent to stop, and counsel the sibling to stay out of the middle.)   We find that adult children who side with one parent sometimes attempt to “guilt” the rejected parent into accepting an unfair settlement.  It is not for the children to judge or to try to get one parent to take less or “walk away.”  Do you plan to care for the parent who gets less than they are entitled to in the divorce settlement, when they are old and sick and don’t have enough money to support themselves?

If you are an adult child and have concerns about what is happening in a divorce between your parents, ask the parent you are concerned about to schedule an appointment with you and their lawyer to discuss your concerns.  If that parent doesn’t have a lawyer, suggest that they get one.  There is no need for a divorce to be ugly.  If both parents are willing to be civil, then both parents should know their rights under the law.  Their settlement should be fair to both of them.

Once your parent is represented by a competent lawyer and knows their rights, step back.  You – and your parents – will have the rest of your lives to pick up the pieces and begin a different relationship.  You, your parents and your siblings will be all the better for having taken this advice.